There’s something magical in the time between awakeness and sleep. I see things. I know things. It’s like I can log in to information that I otherwise don’t have access to.
Two things came to me around 4 a.m. this morning as I rocked Berry back to sleep (and fell asleep myself):
- Reducing my dose of anti-depressant for the last 2 days was a bad idea. I’m not quite ready yet. (Note/confession: I’ve had post partum depression since Berry was born. While pregnant with her I had pre-natal depression.)
- It’s time to apply to Empire State College. I’ll start classes in the fall when Duncan goes to pre-school.
I’ve learned not to question these insights. My half-awake/half-asleep brain knows what’s best for me. I just go with it.
So I finished applying for admission online this morning. (Actually, I just finished taking a shower. But before that, I finished the application.) Requests for transcripts from FSU and RIT are in the mail. ESC admission thingy done online. And now it’s time for lunch.
Of course, with every college application, there’s the admissions essay. So glad I’m a writer. I won’t share the whole thing with you, because it’s embarrassingly admissions-y. But here’s the first part:
I woke up one day, my junior year in high school, with what felt like the flu. It wasn’t. Eventually, I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia, a debilitating chronic illness. I stayed out of school for a while, but finished my junior year going to school on a part-time basis. After resting for the summer, I went back full-time for my senior year, excited to take classes I hadn’t had time for before – art and ceramics – along with physics, economics and others.
I lasted a month before I had a severe relapse. But I didn’t give up. I finished high school through homebound schooling – calling into a tele-class with other kids in similar medical situations. It wasn’t fun, but I made it through. I graduated sixth in my class.
Events repeated themselves when I went to
. Mid-way through the year I had another relapse. But I finished spring semester, dropping only one course (ballet), before I moved back home. Florida State University
When I got a great job at RIT, I immediately enrolled for classes. I was determined to finish school. But the classroom setting wasn’t right for me. I needed more flexibility and other adult learners.
Since then, I’ve gotten married and had two lovely children. My husband is completing his bachelor’s degree via online learning at RIT. My son is going to pre-school in the fall. It’s my turn to finish my undergraduate studies.